Swallow and Digest

There are so many things happened amongst us recently.

All of these -- friendship, accompanying, together-ness, emotions, boy-girl relationship...

At first, I would try to console, telling this and that, giving advices.

Now I don't want to bother anymore.

Whatever you want to do, or you feel as you want to do, just go ahead. They are non of my business after all.

Boycotting, fine. Back-stabbing, okay.

Do you think you are the only one who has harsh feeling when you acted that way? NO! We all did.

What more could I have done? I can only shut my mouth, watch, observe, accept, and then swallow and digest.

I am too tired to entertain you anymore. You won't understand no matter how hard we have tried to explain.

Bye bye.

Birthday "surprise"

I have been thinking over and over, whether or not should I write this post. Since this blog has went quite "public" already.

And then I came to realize, why should I bother so much? This is my blog, my personal blog. Even if the post I wrote offended someone else, you can just ignore my post. This is a place to express what have slipped through my mind, and the happenings as well.
For whom who had read my "syok sendiri" post, you all know that I don't like surprises and celebration which I think are troublesome.

During that special day of mine, I woke up, surprisingly, quite early in the morning.

I opened youtube, listened to Bruno Mars' The Lazy Song.

In another window, I opened my favourite Domo Kun.

I laid on my bed, read some articles. Tried to relax myself as much as I could in just one day.

I enjoyed, and I felt blessed. What a nice day :D

That was a friday night. I attended friday night service with other church members as usual. There were only a few of them knew that it was my birthday. I told them because I assumed they would respect me on things that I dislike.

After the dinner-together, when I came out from the church van, I saw a cake at the front seat.

I said no, definitely no for that. Then one of them whispered to me that there will be only 4 of them.

I "warned" them in a way of kidding that I don't want thing like this. They promised me they would not do so. They just kinda forced me to cut the cake, so called traditional.

Things always would not turn out just like what you want it to be.

After the service ended, those in the church van wanted to celebrate with me.

They followed me back home. Screaming my name, annoucing loudly that it is my birthday. I can just choose to entertain them.

I knew the good intension of you all. But I really don't feel like doing this. Especially the birthday song and the blowing of candles. and also when you guys asked me to bite the candles out of the cake =.=

Out of all that, I particularly dislike the face that one of them showed. I have already mentioned N-times that I don't need all these. But you guys insisted, so I am fine with coordination.

But can you just show some respect to me? Don't try to push me so hard. You made me said something harsh, you made me unintentionally build up awkwardness among us. You made me feel like I am the one to be blamed. Your attitude made others feel like I don't appreciate what you all have did.

What the fuck? Why am I apologizing to every each of them in the middle of the night? It was my f*cking birthday, and I was saying sorry! Deng!!

and so, that was my so called "birthday surprise", which I ruined it, and I felt uneasy about.

Westlake 有變態！

對！就是像你看到的標題一樣！

Westlake有變態！！！

平時我把曬幹了的衣服收回房間之後都不會第一時間就折好疊好。我習慣把它們先掛在衣櫥裏面，隔了一天之後再整理。

今天早上我把前天和昨天收回來的衣服整理好了。打算去洗澡之際，發現-----------內衣不見了！！！！！(╰_╯)#

我靠！！！我靠！！！！(#‵′)靠

到底是哪一個烏龜王八蛋做了這麼TMD讓我生氣的事？！

靠(#‵′)靠

我靠( ‵o′)凸

我靠( ‵o′)凸

我靠( ‵o′)凸

我靠( ‵o′)凸

我靠( ‵o′)凸

貼身衣物的數量都已經不是卓卓有餘的了，這麼一來我又得花一筆錢去添購那該死的貼身衣物。

現在的心情已經不是生氣兩個字可以概括的了。我如今多麼希望自己是那些該死的憤怒的小鳥！我要變成黑色的那隻炸彈鳥，看到烏龜王八蛋的時候可以飛奔過去一把將他炸個稀巴爛！

我要把你炸得稀巴爛！

没有什么可辩的

我在想什么？我到底在干嘛呀？真是失策了。

怪我们吗？说到底也不全然都是我们的错。

可能是那天的天气。

可能是我。

也有可能是你或妳，他或她。

我没办法找出一个真正的理由。或许没有理由还比较好。这样我们就可以辩一辩，辩清真伪，或者越辩越糊涂。

说到底，我真的有点生气了。

就这样。掰。

能不能又快乐又伤心

炎热的午后让人心情很沉重。闷热的空气焖得我黏腻腻的。

听了很多很多的音乐和歌曲，不管是小声地跟着哼，还是大声地和着唱，都赶不走那股闷闷的，憋在心里头的骚包。

气煞了！

多希望自己脑袋和嘴巴都给它放干净一点。

不再乱想一通。不再乱说话。不再随便跟别人动手动脚。

好希望自己也能像以前一样，开心就大声笑，快乐就蹦蹦跳跳。而不是像现在一样，不管是头发、言语、行动都要在意别人怎么看。

好无聊啊！！

祝大家每一天都快乐。快乐地玩，快乐地生活，快乐地大声唱歌。

ps为什么是快乐？难道是行动快别人一步就会乐起来？

Special day!

It is my birthday!! Let me "syok-sendiri" a bit. Haha.

I am pre-posting this because I may not have time to post anything after this. Just feel not to post.

I had hidden my birthday from fb. I just don't need wishes from whosoever that I am not familiar with. Somes that I even hated for have to drop by to "share" on my wall. What the....

Well, tomorrow is just another usual day. :) I am not having a celebration or a dinner-together. I think it is kind of troublesome. But I do have a greatest thought of the day!

Haha! I am going to cut my hair!!! Ok, it is not a big deal but I am already bored with my waist-length long hair. It has been extremely hot these days. I don't think I can cope with the hotness =.=

Happy Birthday to me!! :DD Yay!! I am officially 23-years-old now! Haha. Feel so ooooldd. Thank you dad and mom for all you have given me. and also not to forget, thank God for His greatest love that He allows me to live until now.

天下乌鸦一般黑

这一次的乌鸦并不是指作恶多端的人，而是指很喜欢把自己搞得很忧郁的人。

我知道忧郁是一种个性。可是你不觉得随着年龄增长，忧郁这些东西只能留给自己吗？比如在blog上抒发一点，又或者写一些简短的日记--一些只有自己看得到的日记。而不是每隔10分钟就在status发疯。

那时候的你已经不是忧郁了，你是幼稚。

如果你思想不长进，那为何还要继续在年龄上增长？

任性只留给20岁以前。20岁以后，请不要让人家觉得你的任性和忧郁，只是一种无知的幼稚。

你里里外外的黑，是时候被漂白了。

Emo，不适合你。